It has been said, “Children brought up in love are seldom brought up in court.” Likewise. Children who are brought up in a home where outgoing friendliness and kindness is the everyday atmosphere of living, are more likely to almost unconsciously acquire the habit of responding in a friendly and loving way to others.
This reminds me of the occasion when my daughter and I took her triplets (at an early age) on a pre-holiday bus trip to New York City to see the sights while others attended a Broadway play. As we were boarding the bus to return home, my brother, who had driven down from Maine, and my sister who resided in “The Big Apple,” were giving each triplet a monetary bill (I do not remember the denomination of each) as before we realized it, each of them had turned and was proceeding to follow the first one’s action of dropping it into the hat of a peddler who was sitting near by.
On the other hand adults whose early lives were spent in homes where there was a great deal of unkindness may find, as they grow older, that they wish to become more loving once they realize how far their feelings and conduct fall below the high standard of unity and love.
The Baha’I Holy Writings overflow with daily prayers and exercises promoting self-transformation, independently and collectively that assist us in such high aspirations.
High among my favorites is a little book entitled Counsels of Perfection from which we have held many most inspiring sessions. The first instruction, “We must associate with ALL humanity in gentleness and kindness”-a totally inconceivable and unpopular concept in today’s increasingly rude and insensitive society.
Next, “Under no circumstances whatsoever should we assume any attitude except that of gentleness and humility”-now we’re getting worse as humility is generally perceived as weakness although quite the contrary. It takes great courage to be gentle, especially if a male (or a Black woman). The opposite strong more forceful dispositions are often more indicative of inmates of “the Prison of Self,” the chapter that precedes the one on Gentleness and Love. The numerous subtitles in this most intriguing chapter include, I Must be First, “What Will Other People Say (or think)?”-and the king of them all, “Finding Faults with Others,” a major weakness of many of us.
A simple memorization that we begin within Baha’i children’s sessions in particular, “One must see in every human being only that which is worthy of praise!” is also one we most frequently forget to apply to ourselves-as I was once most diplomatically reminded of by my only grandson at a very early age. The writings also remind us, “Humanity is not perfect. There are imperfections in every human being and we will always become unhappy if we look toward the people themselves…Therefore, do not look at the shortcomings of anyone; see with the eyes of forgiveness-as God forgives us while the imperfect eye beholds imperfections.”
The eye that covers faults looks toward the Creator of all souls.”
