To be hurt and forgive is divine. But to understand and not be hurt is greater!
This profound statement has been a primary focus of mine since first hearing it from the Baha’i writings over 40 years ago.
Everyone is hurt at some point in time by some harsh or thoughtless words or deeds. This basic fact transcends age, gender, social status, religious or political persuasion, national origin or any other man-made dividing lines that we have so effectively drawn. This hurt that most of us are so deeply affected and subsequently governed by, differs only by degree and how it is handled–which of course varies from time to time.
Once this erosive condition becomes firmly established, however, we will invariably find ourselves looking for reasons to justify it.
A wise cliche’ that I would leave with each student audience in particular, upon addressing them is that “Nothing that happens to us throughout life, good or bad, can ever be as important as our attitude toward it.” In fact the only difference between a stumbling block or stepping stone, obstacle or opportunity is our attitude toward it.”
The biggest challenge is practicing the perceived art of hurting without hating. This requires perpetual, consistent conditioning though spiritual deepenings and especially through frequent association with spiritual people. Too often we may feel spiritually uplifted enough to handle the uplifting of others on our own, only to find they can bring us down farther and faster than we can ever uplift them.
Consider the hot coals of a fireplace or even the charcoals of a grill that turn firery red while lumped together. Yet how quickly any single one of them dies should it roll out separately and remain alone.
I often think of our fore-parents who for centuries (before court ordered desegregation) had so many reasons to hate, yet seldom did. They were too busy pooling their spiritual and other strengths to support one another to “keep hope alive” as Jesse Jackson always urges. Why then with so many more doors and opportunities open to us today, do we find so much more hating and hurting? Are we falling asleep at the wheel, feeling that we have overcome simply because we can get deeper in debt today than ever before, can spend our money in more places than ever before, make more money on low-ceiling jobs and own less than ever before?
How much longer can we afford to allow ourselves to be people-programmed to keep hating and sub-sequently hurting ourselves and others? Through such sad conditions the masses can be easily manipulated by a few for the sake of control! Man is the architect and controller of hate and greed by simply turning us against one another by any divide; the Willie Lynch theory.
Most impressive will ever be by inclusion with 20 Virginians who accompanied (then) Governor Linwood Holton to SAC Airforce Command in Offutt, Neb. We were taken through a crash course in 6-week basic infantry training, to desensitize recruits to killing among other things. I have since been a drum major for peace as there have been and continue to be wars since man’s beginning! None of which have resulted in PEACE!
While in Israel a few years ago I watched protestors marching in the streets with banners (in English) reading, “Don’t make New Terrorists trying to get rid of terrorism!”
God is the architect and controller of love. Under whose control would we rather be?
“To be hurt and forgive is divine” can give one a sense of saintliness. “But to understand and not be hurt is greater!” as through humility one is more connected with the Source of PEACE–when we become spiritually mature enough to understand and not be hurt.
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