by Shawn Nowlin
Given the current play of COVID-19, is getting the whole family together a good idea for Father’s Day? That is a question that many Roanoke residents had to ask themselves this year.
Albeit under less than ideal circumstances, many families nevertheless got a chance to make some memories together. Some also used the day to thank the men who had a positive influence on their life. To celebrate Father’s Day this year, Andre Davis, 29, and his dad binged watched their favorite TV show, The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.
“Growing up, this was a weekend tradition for us. He would often use the sitcom to teach me valuable life lessons,” Davis said. “With everything going on today, it felt great to just sit back and share a laugh with my old man.”
There was never a day when Matthew Blair didn’t feel loved by his father growing up. The two regularly went fishing, attended pro sports games and experienced live music concerts throughout his childhood. Today, Blair is the father of a 12-year-old daughter with autism.
“What I love about my daughter includes, but is not limited to her sense of humor, her enthusiasm, her beautiful singing voice, her wild imagination, her ability to express love and show affection, her resilience and her unbridled intellect. She is the best thing that has ever happened to me,” he said. “Father’s Day represents my gratitude for the example set by other fathers who love and show up for their kids, and what I can learn and apply from their efforts.”
All through high school, Tom McCracken, the pastor of CommUNITY Church, was surrounded by kids who regularly celebrated Father’s Day. He was not so fortunate. While his stepfather helped raise him, his biological dad left the family when he was an infant. McCracken and his wife have four adult children who all live on their own.
“Children need consistent affirmation, acceptance and approval. There is a fine line, however, between being a parent and being a friend. Being able to see all of the guidance, prayers, and love fleshed out in a successful life is the best part about being a father,” he said. “They say that parents aren’t truly appreciated until their children have their own children, yet there are glimpses before that occurs.”
While their relationship has strained in recent years, Kimberly Ellis credits her father for shaping her into the independent woman she is today. “Even though my childhood wasn’t always great, my dad always made sure that we had a roof over our head, food on the table and clothes on our backs. We always went to the beach every year for summer vacation, which is something I’ll never forget,” she said.
When RJ Brown caught his first fish as a child, his father was right by his side. Brown now tries to create similar memories for his two children.
“There is no real way to plan for being a father. Let’s face it, we are all going to come short sometimes when it comes to parenting,” he said. “The best part of being a father is that you have someone that wants to be just like you and oftentimes are exactly like you innately.”
Cara Casey-Hamlar and her husband, Byron, welcomed their daughter on Father’s Day in 2016. Casey-Hamlar said that her husband and father share many similar qualities: hard-working, compassionate, God-fearing, patient and understanding.
“I was fortunate enough to grow up with a mom and dad in the same home. I also have a brother who is six years my junior. For the greater part of my childhood, my parents worked opposite shifts. My mother worked nights and my father was on call 24/7/365. Sometimes the two seemed like ships passing in the night. However, I do remember that every free minute was spent together as a family,” Casey-Hamlar said.
She added, “No father is perfect, and mine was no exception, but he was present, and that makes all the difference.”