People who have been harmed by misanthropism (a rubric for all hatred-based “ISMS”), although difficult to avoid, should never internalize the victim definition! There is a huge difference between suffering a wrong and inculcating the sense that one is a helpless victim. Self-Victimization requires more effort from the people who have been wronged than from the misanthropists and is more useful to them than are direct affronts.
Some acts that were committed years ago and condoned by our governments and many white southern churches – such as lynchings, for example — are not permitted today. Even historically, moreover, the primary targets were not the ones lynched, but those who looked like Billie Holiday’s Strange Fruit and who, following the lynchings, would internalize the lesson and stay in their prescribed places psychologically and physically.
Misanthropists, and even “innocent” beneficiaries of the results of misanthropism do not care, or care to know, what conditions keep despised people from participating fully and competitively in society; but today they would prefer that subordinated people retard their own advancement by inflicting harm on themselves and each other.
Atavistic Tyrannists from among oppressed peoples also profit when they become self-anointed saviors. Their power as titular leaders requires the continuation of self- victimization. Unfortunately, the self-victimized feel vindicated when their spokespersons rail verbally against assaults. Such charlatans are acceptable to the persecutors because they attack the symbols of oppression, but the real tormenters know that the charlatans have no intention or capacity to eradicate oppression.
Once a person internalizes the helpless-victim syndrome, some other people are raised to the powerful role of victor, since there cannot be a victim without a victor. This elevation empowers victors and people who look like them, whether the latter want the power or not; and eliminates power from the victims, their descendants, and people who look like them. People who consider themselves helpless-victims beg for handouts instead of planning and seeking the wherewithal to empower themselves and subsequent generations.
Children cannot look up to victims, and if they cannot look up to their progenitors, they will look down on themselves. My deceased father was Black and subjected to racism his entire life, but he did not consider himself to be or conduct himself as a helpless victim. He showed me how to empower myself to contend in mainstream America and prevail. One of the earliest, most powerful, and most helpful lessons my father taught me by his demonstration of dignity and self-respect was that nobody can degrade you or take your power without your permission and participation.
There are seven distinct steps in the Self -Victimization process: 1. the offensive word, gesture or action; 2. seeing or hearing it; 3. understanding it; 4. accepting the meaning for yourself; 5. suffering an emotional response; 6. making the decision about how to respond; and 7. taking action. WHO DOES THE MOST WORK?
People who have been subjected to bigotry, but who choose to succeed, must overcome man-made impediments in the American social system that confront Americans in general; but, in addition, they must overcome psychological stresses normally created when they experience undeserved punishment, such as misogynism, which misanthropic acts certainly are.
Affronted but courageous non-victims risk attack, not only from people who consider them inferior (i.e., Trump against Obama); but also, too often, they are attacked by their own people who have self-victimized. Self-victimizers often become comfortable because they blame their failures on external circumstances. In view of people who have moved onward and upward, self-victimizers are forced to rationalize their own lack of success, despite having the same culture and ethnicity and having shared at earlier times the same space as did their successful peers. Self-victimizers have been known to call successful Blacks bougies, insufficiently Black, Uncle Toms and Oreos. People who have self-victimized often posture with a belligerent and raucous bravado; nonetheless, their inherent weakness still shines through.
Many people are intimidated by strong, successful Black people who know they descended from people who overcame even greater obstacles than exist today and, yet, helped build Black communities and America. These stalwarts see success as the best revenge, become masters of their own minds, fashion their own character, and pursue a positive destiny for themselves and their descendants.
We who care about our own children and America must do more to encourage youngsters not to succumb to meaningless words and symbols, but to use the same inherent intelligence and power that existed within their ancestors to forge their own future and not the future which their enemies have laid out for them. Teach them to Dream; but teach them also that a Dream with a Plan is a Vision. Teach them how to plan, implement, work diligently, and persevere to prevail!
