One phrase that speaks to the pressures of life’s burdens is: “Just because I carry it well doesn’t mean it’s not heavy.”
Over the years, mental health and a space to freely express oneself without judgment have become priorities for African Americans.
It is normal to experience grief and pain, especially after losing a loved one to senseless gun violence. If that grief turns into prolonged distress that includes an inability to function in daily life, joining a community support group can help one’s journey tremendously.
On Aug. 25, Families Expecting Deliverance Using Prayer (FEDUP) hosted a “Real Men Grieve Too” community discussion at the West End Community Room on Patterson Avenue. A variety of topics were discussed, ranging from dealing with anger to utilizing local resources available.
Those who participated were Alvin Crutchfield, Brandy Campbell, Cynthia Kasey, Debra Gates, Denise White, Gloria Manns, Joe Ruben, Keshawn Kasey, Letia Harris, Sage Law and Unique Hylton.
Guiding the discussion was Marvin Fields, the founder of Field of Hope and Dreams, a mentoring company. “From the moment you lose someone you love to senseless gun violence, it stays with you forever. Learning how to process that grief in practical ways makes all the difference in the world,” he said.
“When the killer decided to pull that trigger and take my brother’s life, I lost a part of myself. This was nearly 30 years ago, and I still have sleepless nights. I cherish the memories more than ever,” Reuben told all in attendance. “The killer took his life, but he could never take his legacy. I am committed to making sure that tragedy won’t be the end of his story.”
Speaking to how preventable violence impacts the community, Harris said, “Recently, while I was working for the Roanoke Housing Authority, a beautiful woman named Alexis Edmunds was murdered in her apartment. She had two small children and was pregnant with another. The father of that child shot and killed her.”
She added, “We are losing the foundation of the Black community – the Black mother. The women who lead, nurture and hold families together are being taken far too soon from us. Alexis’ life mattered. Her work mattered. Her love mattered. Her presence in this community mattered.”
Once the powerful conversation concluded, a complimentary meal was provided by Unk & Nephew. Every fourth Tuesday of the month, the group meets at the Freedom First West End Branch around 7 p.m. Anyone interested in attending is encouraged to do so.
